Wonder

I have two rules about tattoos for myself. Rule number one, it has to be where I can see it and rule number two, it has to be something I want/need to be reminded of for the rest of my life. At the moment, I have two. One on each wrist. The first one, my sister took me to get for my 30th birthday, almost 7 years ago. It’s a heart, completely red— looks like someone drew it on, very child-like, which is intentional. (Funny Story: People often really think and even ask if I drew it on with a sharpe. Ha.)I read the book “Present Over Perfect” by Shanua Niequist several years ago and she talked about getting this tattoo. I remember her saying it reminded her that there was nothing she could do to earn more of the love of God, and there was nothing she could do to take it away. As someone who struggles to receive this truth, I thought it was worth the life-long, daily reminder.

The other tattoo I have I got two years ago in Israel. It is the Hebrew word Zakhar which means “to remember.” This is a word I learned about in Kristi McLelland’s Bible Study, “Jesus and Women”. Listen to what she says about this word:

*Get ready, it’s lengthy but it’s so good!

“We have spiritual disciplines and practices as New Testament believers. We do certain things as Christians to live out our faith. When I hear the phrase, spiritual disciplines, lots of things come to mind such as Bible study, prayer, attending a local church, tithing, living missionally, and serving others.

Throughout time, the Jewish people have also had their own spiritual rhythms and practices – some similar to ours and some unique to their faith. In the Bible, we see God issue many commandments, but He repeats one of them over and over – “remember” and ”do not forget “.

The Lord knows we are a forgetful people. I often forget where I put my car keys. I walk into a room sometimes and forget why I went there in the first place! We are equally forgetful, if not more so, when it comes to our spiritual lives, we tend to have spiritual amnesia. We easily forget the things the Lord has done for us – His faithful record over the course of our whole lives.

Instead, we tend to remember our traumas, our hurts, the things that have devastated us, and left us reeling, trying to catch our breath. We often forget the blessings – the beautiful things and the grace-filled moments when the Lord has provided healing, restoration, redemption, grace, direction, or divine intervention.

The Hebrew word zakhar means to remember.

We typically conceive of remembering, as looking back or thinking back to something in the past. But in the Hebrew culture, remembering is actually considered a forward, moving practice. Remembering is a way to move forward, to step into the unknown future. Biblical remembering, or zakhar, carries the same idea of forward motion.

Here’s how it practically plays out. If you come to a place or a time when you aren’t sure where to go or what to do next, pause and look back. Remember how the Lord met you, directed you, and provided for you in those past times.

Remembering God‘s faithful record in our lives, gives us courage to trust Him in the unknown and live forward. We zakhar (remember) so that we can step forward, because the same God who was faithful to be with us in the past is the God who will be faithful to be with us in a future that may seem unknown. We don’t remember for remembering sake, but we remember to move forward with renewed faith and hope in the God who is shepherding our whole lives.

We can practice zakhar both personally and communally.

In the Jewish feast and festivals, God prescribed corporate occasions for remembering. In these festivals, the Jewish people come together to remember and retell their God stories to their children. They come together to celebrate God‘s faithfulness in their lives and in their stories. Remembering always brings a celebration because God has never failed us – His record is 100 percent.”

Sooooo… yea, that was something I wanted/needed to be reminded of for the rest of my life. Remembering to remember. It’s odd I know, but you get it, yea?

No one has asked for this, but I’m sure you’re all thinking it.

Kristen, why did you name your blog “Never Losing Wonder”?

Great question!

Truth? So I technically created this blog back in March of 2024. It was a whole thing, but the truth is, it wasn’t something I was truly ready for yet. As I was creating it, I had this song stuck in my head.

Wonder by Amanda Cook (I linked it).

Over and over and over, I kept singing “May we never lose our wonder, may we never lose our wonder. Wide eyed and mystified, may we be just like a child, staring at the beauty of the King.”

And I felt like this is what the Lord wanted me to name it. Never Losing Wonder. Not out of pride or accomplishment, but rather out of hope and courage.

Wonder.

I think if I was honest then, I had lost it.

And I think if I am honest now, I still have.

In my over-stimulated, busy life and world, I think it’s gotten lost somewhere between my three second attention span and been-there-done-that, know-it-all, whiny attitude. That may be a little harsh. But is it really any less true? Pain, disappointment, not getting what I want when I want it, feeling behind in the wake of others, tired of waiting, overly confident in what I think is best, the hustle, the grind, the I only have time for the 5 minute Bible studies and the 3 minute prayers— yea, it’s gotten lost somewhere in there. (Just me?)

And the reality is when I lose wonder— I lose sight of the whole point. When I lose wonder, I lose sight of Jesus, of the cross, the resurrection, the abundant life that He gave His life for. The worship of His Majesty, the surrender and awe to His Lordship. The yearn for His Kingdom to invade earth. The restoration, renewal, and purpose of life with God. The LOVE of God.

I think I tell my sister this every single time we are at the beach. (Sorry, not sorry, Sister Bear. It’s a zakhar moment for me.) When I look at the ocean, I can’t help but think of the love of God— the vastness of it, the mystery, the fact that there are parts of it yet to be explored, we can’t even see how far it goes! (Que Moana song) It’s strong enough to move you, pull you, and even kill you, yet when it meets you on the shore, it’s the most gentle encounter you’ll ever experience. That gentleness washes the footprints from the sand, as if they were never there to begin with. The ocean holds treasure, pearls are created here. It calls out to a life of adventure that my soul craves! (Que Moana song) His thoughts about us (individually) outnumber the grains of sand. (Psalm 139:17-18) The sound of the waves are like that of many waters, just like His voice. (Ezekiel 43:2, Revelation 1:15, Revelation 19:6) It’s chaotic, yet He controls it. It’s dangerous, yet we are invited to enjoy it, play in it, become like children again in the midst of it!

Is this not like His love? Am I allowing myself the pleasure of being in awe and wonder over it? Or has it grown stale, cold, faded into the background of my own busy, over-stimulated life— as if I’ve out-grown it, gotten past it, decided to be over it; like a fad out of style or I’ve simply tired of.

“May we never lose our wonder, may we never lose our wonder. Wide eyed and mystified, may we be just like a child, staring at the beauty of the King.”

I don’t want to be over it. I don’t want to be past it. I want to enjoy it again. I want to enjoy Him again.

You know what the ocean isn’t? Fully understood. I don’t think it’s meant to be. We’ve been on this earth how long? And they are still making new discoveries of it.

In the same way, there is no end to the discoveries of the Love of God. The moment I think I’ve got it, a new wave crashes. And I gotta tell ya, sometimes it hurts. Sometimes, it feels like I’m drowning or in over my head and fear takes over, making me feel like I’ve gotta figure out how to navigate it. Or shame rises up, making me feel embarrassed that I have no idea how to swim in it. But honestly, the truth is… that’s ok. I’m ok. I can breathe here with the help of the Holy Spirit. I’m not going to drown. I don’t have to have all the answers, systems or rhythms down pat. He’s got me and He wants to show me, dare I say, surprise me with how much He can love me. Even here. Even in this season of life.

Don’t skip this next part. Read it slowly.

“And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.

Now all glory to God, who is able, through His mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. Glory to Him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen.” -Ephesians 3:18-21

Keep going! Take it in!

“What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is for us, who can ever be against us? Since He did not spare even His own Son but gave Him up for us all, won’t He also give us everything else? Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for His own? No one—for God Himself has given us right standing with Himself. Who then will condemn us? No one—for Christ Jesus died for us and was raised to life for us, and He is sitting in the place of honor at God’s right hand, pleading for us.

Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean He no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? (As the Scriptures say, ‘For your sake we are killed every day; we are being slaughtered like sheep.^’) No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.

And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:31-39

Whew… this is truth! May it sink into our hearts.

Your encouragement for the week:

Maybe you’re like me and have lost wonder! Maybe you need to draw, with a sharpe, a red, child-like heart on your wrist this week, as a reminder that there is nothing you can do to earn more of the love of God and there’s nothing you can do to take it away. Or maybe you need to write the word zakhar on a post-it and put it in your car and practice the spiritual discipline of remembering your God stories as a way to move you forward. Maybe you need make a date with your husband, kids, or a friend and retell those God stories as a way to encourage them and your own heart. Or maybe you need to put your phone down, turn off the TV, find a quiet spot and let yourself simply be loved by God. Maybe you need to let yourself be in awe of Him again. Or maybe you need to turn on “Wonder” by Amanda Cook and let it lead you to a place of worship.

Whatever you choose to do, give yourself space and permission to stare at Jesus and let your heart be filled with Wonder!

“May we never lose our wonder, may we never lose our wonder. Wide eyed and mystified, may we be just like a child, staring at the beauty of the King.”